The Business of Writing: Avoiding Author Intrusion

By: Linda Rohrbough

I think Jerry Jenkins has it right when he says Christian authors are the worst about author intrusion. In the Christian world, they call it being “preachy.” But I’ve seen plenty of liberal “preachy.”

Author intrusion comes in a couple of forms. One is the author just flat telling the reader, either through dialog on the part of a character or in narrative, how the reader should think. Note I used the word “should.” In 12-Step groups, they call it “should-ing on yourself." 

The other is just boring the reader with stuff they’ve already figured out.

Either form of author intrusion will kill the reader’s interest in your work deader than a door nail. And this can produce the worst possible outcome for you as an author – which is readers who don’t finish your book. Readers who don’t finish books don’t buy another book by that author and they don’t talk about or refer those books to other readers.

Author intrusion is the opposite from authors who say they want to write but they don’t have anything to say. Some authors want to write because they want to fix people. They want everyone to see it their way. And to make sure that happens, they are going to not only show the reader what happened, they’re going to tell the reader how to think about it.

Clearly, it’s important to have something to say. And you need to figure out what that is. But this is a show, not tell, lesson.

The way you change someone’s mind isn’t by brow beating them with an idea. It’s by creating an emotional response. Emotion is the ticket and you don’t get emotion through intellect. You get it through experience.

The rule of thumb is this: if you notice the author behind the story, then it’s probably author intrusion.

The risk around giving you an example is most concepts that people get “preachy” around are controversial. But I’m going to take the risk. The best example I can think of is Jerry Jenkins told the story about how he tipped a black janitor in front of his colleagues at an event he was attending. Later, that janitor took him aside privately and asked Jerry if he would have tipped him if he’d been white. Jerry said that incident changed his viewpoint.

Now, author intrusion would be for me as the author or have a character, such as Jerry or the janitor, go into a discourse about Jerry’s motives, how his viewpoint changed, society in general, or the subtleties of prejudice. But if you learn to trust your reader, you can be confident the reader will get the point from the story and the emotional impact it carries. The reader doesn’t need the author to tell them how to think. And if they do, then you as the author haven’t done your job, and you need to go back and rework the story.

Author intrusion is one of those places where it’s hard to see the forest for the trees in your own work. As always, it’s good to develop a small network of people you trust to look over your manuscript. But if you don’t have your network handy, the red flag looking for author intrusion in my own work is I ask myself, do I feel a sense of anxiety that the reader isn’t going to “get it?” Because if I do, that’s usually the first sign that I’m getting ready to stick my toes, or maybe my whole foot, into author intrusion.

The bottom line is this: learn to tell the story, then learn to trust your reader. 

About the Author:  Linda Rohrbough has been writing since 1989, and has more than 5,000 articles and seven books to her credit, along with writing for television, and seven national awards for her fiction and non-fiction. Find her on Facebook as "Linda Rohrbough - Author" or visit her website: www.LindaRohrbough.com.

Author Intrusion: What Is It? Am I Doing It?

Want to create memorable characters? Let them speak for themselves. In our current social and political climate, I thought it was time for a reminder...

By: Donnell Ann Bell

In real life, one of the things I detest is someone with a foul mouth. I grew up in a family who didn’t use profanity, and the times someone did sent shock waves through the house.  Seismologists in Boulder thought it was an earthquake—no, it was just someone in my house using an expletive.

So if I have this mindset, why  did I paint my protagonist in THE PAST CAME HUNTING in her teens as somebody my cop hero described as, “using language that would make a cellblock proud?” And why does my ex-con in the book say a word I absolutely despise?

Because I write fiction, and those characters aren’t me. Nor do my characters hold my belief system. They have their own values–or lack thereof–as well as completely different backgrounds than me.  That’s so important to remember when writing a book. If the character doesn’t behave true to his or character, the reader may not be able to pinpoint what’s wrong, but chances are what he dislikes is the author butting into the story.

What is author intrusion? It’s putting something in the book that yanks the reader out; that stops the reader enough to wonder why is this in here or why did the author hold back?

For instance, say you’re a right wing Republican or a left wing Democrat, and you have not set up the character’s political belief system. From out of the blue, because the author is focused on something that happened in the news that day, you have your protagonist say something about his constitutional right to bear arms or how natural gas drilling is destroying the environment.  If these topics end up in your book, and you haven’t established that your character is for or against these issues–that is author intrusion. What’s more, shame on any editor who doesn’t catch these and tell the author either set this up or take it out.

A few years ago, I read an inspirational romance in which the story opened with a good looking guy walking on scene.  I never was clear why, perhaps the author wanted to ensure the reader knew she was reading an inspirational.  But the moment the heroine saw this man, she started praying.  Our heroine hadn’t even talked to the guy, but to ensure she didn’t lust after him, she said, “Dear Lord, help me.  Save me from myself,” etc. etc.

Huh? Does that sound realistic? If the guy had approached her, and she was smitten, a slight prayer might have been in order. But they hadn’t even met. I felt the set up was completely wrong.  What’s more, I felt that author was intruding on my story. Yes, when I pay money for a book, it becomes MY story.

Source: Pixabay

An ability to eliminate author intrusion is what separates a good storyteller from the mediocre. If you have a critique partner you respect, and he tells you he thinks your protagonist/antagonist is acting out of character, give that CP chocolate. Then take a look at what’s bothering him. You never want your research to show, or be guilty of author intrusion.

About the Author:  Donnell Ann Bell is the managing editor for Writing from the Peak, the coordinator for the monthly Open Critique held on the first Wednesday of every month, and one of Pikes Peak Writer's board members at large. She is a best-selling romantic suspense and mystery author. To learn more about her books, find her at www.donnellannbell.com